LizstarTrek - Enterprise Season 4 episodes 16-21

Every Sunday my Twitch subs and I watch Star Trek in my Discord. Here are my reviews and thoughts on each of the episodes as I see it. If you’re curious about a nerd’s views on Star Trek episodes, please read on, I go quite in depth with some of these episodes! I’ve watched some Star Trek before but not all of it!

IT’S BEEN A LOOOOONG ROOOOOAAAD

Divergence - ENT 3/10

At the end of the last episode, the Klingons put a bomb on the warpcore. Now, we find out that it is set so that it’ll explode if Enterprise goes below warp 5. Holy shit, it’s speed. They need to have the columbia move up next to them, also warp 5, within like 40 meters of each other, and then do some Shenanigans to get rid of the bomb. Specifically, they need to have a tether set up between the two so that Trip can climb up from the Columbia to Enterprise and fix the warpcore.

Well I’m glad they did all that drama getting Trip over to the Columbia top have them just bring him back with this. Totally wasn’t a complete waste of time.

This is how NX class ships fuck.

The climb from Columbia to Enterprise is kind of cool, but it’s thrown out the fucking window when for some reason they don’t just untether the cable and need to make it extra tense for no reason. Also, the plan is to shut down the Reactor, erase some stuff, all while inside the Columbia’s warp field so they don’t go below warp 5. I dunno how to tell you this, but you did NOT need Trip for this. I’m a Trek fan, I can suspend my disbelief for some dumb technobabble shit, but this is Dumb lol. Also it’s a good thing it goes from 0 to warp 5 hot immediately, huh?

Meanwhile, Antaak, the Klingon Doctor, tries to convince Phlox to help him again. Remember, Phlox said “fuck you” and is now sentenced to death. They agree and decide to try and decieve the Klingon General. Cause hey, they’re prolly gonna die anyway, and this way they can save a bunch of Klingon lives? He narrows it down to four possible strains that could cure the virus. One works, three are lethal. It’ll take a week to test safely. They don’t have a week, the fleet will be there in like a day to wipe the colony off the map.

There’s also lots of stuff here with Section 31. It explains why they’re named that way specifically. Article whatever, section 31. He’s like “in times of danger, rule scan be bended :)” “What danger?!” Archer says. “Oh, take your pick.” YEAH, THAT’S KIND OF THE PROBLEM WITH THAT KIND OF RULE.

This is Krell, fleet Admiral. He’s here to blow everything the fuck up. He was actually in cahoots with Harris, the Section 31 guy, but double crossed him when he didn’t need him anymore cause of course he did. He ignores everyone’s pleas that they can cure the virus. Phlox and Archer work to cure the plague while Columbia and Enterprise fight three Klingon cruisers. Phlox needs to directly infect Archer to get some human antibodies or some shit, it’s kind of stupid. They get the cure, and then Plhox sends the virus over to infect Krell intentionally. What the fuck

Do you remember when Phlox’s character trait was being EXTREMELY ethical and never bending on those ethics?

The disease now JUST gets rid of Klingon’s ridges, and does “slight neural realignment”. Dunno how that can be SLIGHT but okay. Also Trip is staying here for Some Reason. JUST to oversee repairs. I’m sure the new Chief Engineer will be happy about that.

Meanwhile, Harris calls up to go “actually them betraying me was the plan :) It all went perfectly, we are not idiots or patsies”. Great. They COULD have had this work out because Section 31 was just idiots, but instead, the Bad Solution Works, like it ALWAYS does with Enterprise.

Also why is Reed still here? Why does he have rank?

Divergence - ENT 2/10

Enterprise is Star Trekkin’ across the universe, and then is found by an Orion, one Harrad-Sar, who at first is aggressive, but then seems eager for business discussions with Archer that could smooth over relations with Starfleet and the Orion Syndicate. No one trusts this with a ten foot pole, especially after last time, where six crew members almost became slaves. But hey, one less enemy COULD be nice.

Meanwhile, Kelby, the new Chief Engineer, is pissed that Trip is still here. Yeah, as expected.

We get a very, VERY drawn out scene where Reed and Archer are horny about some Orion dancers. Yes, green women hot, thank you, get to the point.

Stop trying to convince me Reed is straight. I believe it less than Straight Bashir. To help a mining trade deal go smoother, Harrad-Sar gives them the three Orion slave women. Archer just accepting slaves now, huh? All the men onboard the ship are already being Weird about it.

Yep, it’s pheromones. It’s affecting EVERYONE on ship actually. Even the women, though they’re just irritable and headachy. It’s making Phlox fall asleep. The men are going fucking nuts. Kelby sabatoges the ship because of it. Only two people are not affected……. Trip, and T’Pol. Fuck offfff. It’s cause of their dumb Force Diad thing isn’t it.

They lock the Orions up cause it’s clear they are intentionally sabatoging the ship, though they leave a guard in to watch them. Immediately after Archer was ALMOST convinced to let them free, only stopped by T’Pol. Are these the dumbest fucking astronauts of all time? Why is this crew SO INCOMPETENT?

This episode also fails because everyone is SUPPOSED to be acting out of character but they’re…. not. Archer is angry and belligerent. He ALWAYS IS, ANYWAY.

Is this the MRA episode

Trip and T’Pol manage to stop it and defeat the Orions, and they go off with their tails between their legs. Meanwhile, T’Pol and Trip are annoying heterosexual. Just fucking communicate, y’all.

They kiss, and T’Pol asks him to stay. Trip then admits that he was planning to stay anyway and put in a request to stay 3 days ago. So he WAS TRYING TO TAKE KELBY’S JOB AFTER ALL. BTW they decided Kelby shouldn’t stay chief engineer cause of what he did under the effects of the pheromones. That’s so extremely not fair.

In a Mirror, Darkly - ENT 8/10

We get scenes from First Contact, where Vulcans made… first contact. Remember when Zefram Cochrane tried to salute, then failed, then gave a handshake? Well that almost happens. Then uh, then he pulls out a fucking shotgun and blasts the Vulcans away.

We go to the current day. Things are going well in the Terran Empire. Captain Forrest rules over Enterprise cleanly. His doctor, Phlox, has recently invented a machine for perfect torture. But things are tense with his first officer, Archer. Archer believes he found a future ship in Tholian space, and wants thgem to go after it. It’d be GREAT for his career. So he mutinies, with the help of the sadistic MACO Reed and the other MACOs. He’s now in charge, with T’Pol promoted to first officer, over Reed, who prolly won’t like it. Hoshi was Forrest’s toy, and tries to seduce then kill Archer, but fails.

Archer captures a Tholian. Remember these guys? They’re from TOS and are major antagonists, in the Tholian Web episode, but have never been seen since… but it’s nice to see them again. Archer tortures it for a bit and gets information of where the ship might be, though doesn’t let the others kill it. In fact, Archer has been avoiding killing everyone this episode! Forrest directly says he’s always been docile and has no ambition.

Eventually Forrest is released by T’Pol, who was never on Archer’s side. But Archer had sent a message to the Empire, who wants them to get this ship anyway. Welp. Forrest is back in command, though. We also find she was a spy on board who mindwashed Trip to sabatoge the cloak. Trip is NOT happy about this.

Enterprise gets to where the other ship is, the USS Defiant, a ship from the TOS episode Tholian Web. Cool. Enterprise is caught in a Tholian Web, as Archer and a few others gain control of the Defiant. Forrest sacrifices himself to buy time for the escape pods. Then we watch Enterprise blow the fuck up… to be continued.

I like how overacted this is btw, it’s fun.

In a Mirror, Darkly Part II - ENT 8/10

The Defiant manages to break free of the Tholians and escape, picking up the escape pods. Archer is back in control, though things are tenuous.

The Defiant is a Starfleet vessel from the Prime universe, 100 years later. AKA, a TOS era vessel. It is very, VERY TOS. All the same sound, all the same designs. They even have the same outfits :D It’s very fun. Archer commands they try and fix the ship and give it warp drive so they can go to the front lines and help put down a rebellion. But something is in the crawlways and is killing everyone. They ask one of the slaves they captured… it’s a Gorn named Slar. OH BOY! GORN!

We’ve had Gorn show up like 5 times and EVERY TIME they are drastically different.

What proceeds is them trying to hunt down this Gorn as he sets traps and picks them off. Holy shit. It’s Die Hard. And just like Die Hard, we’re rooting for the Gorn! It’s the second Heroic Gorn!

We get a fight with Archer and the Gorn, and Archer ONLY wins because he cheats by having the grav plating increased to incapacitate the Gorn.

The Defiant arrives to save the last Terran ship from rebel attacks. The admiral on the only ship left is like “yo good job, thanks. I’ll take this ship :) You’ll get a promotion I guess”, so Archer fucking kills him. Oh he’s getting a bit big for his britches. He practically declares that he will become emperor with the power of this ship. Aight dude.

Meanwhile, T’Pol is looking at the ship’s databanks. The idea of a Federation fills her with revolutionary vigor. She’s terrified of the idea of Archer becoming Emperor, he’s a racist fuckhead, so she tries to get Soval, who is now the leader of the dead admiral’s ship, to join her in stopping him and blowing up the Defiant. They also rope Phlox, the only OTHER non-Terran, into joining them.

CAT FIGHT, CAT FIGHT

The plan fails. They stop Phlox, capture T’Pol, and kill Soval. Archer deletes the history, and is like “YAY I’M GONNA BE EMPEROR :D” His sexpot, Hoshi, poisons him, makes out with Mayweather in front of him…

There’s a new woman in charge now, who played everyone and took control.

Demons - ENT 7.5/10

This is what our group considers the “true end” of Enterprise, because of the shit behind the TRUE finale. We’ll get to it though.

We have a weird guy, played by Robocop so I’m calling him Robert Cop from now on, and his lackey making weird comments about a Vulcan baby. Then, we go to a big event where a bunch of different aliens are coming together to form an alliance. The start of the Federation :3 how nice. But it’s kind of ruined by a woman coming in with a hole in her stomach going “THEY’RE GOING TO KILL HER, DON’T LET THEM” and giving a vial of hair over to T’Pol.

Phlox runs the analysis of the hair, and finds out that it’s a Vulcan/Human hybrid of Trip and T’Pol. Trip IMMEDIATELY goes to T’Pol blaming and whining about it. Stop, dude.

Archer gets info that this might be the work of a xenophobic extremist group. “Terra Prime”. To get more information, Archer has Reed contact… Section 31. Ohhh boy. Good. They learn more about Terra Prime, including that the lead dude in charge of the peace conference WAS a member at one point, years ago, and there might be more out there.

Meanwhile, completely out of coincidence, an old flame of Mayweather’s is here to smooch him. She’s a reporter doing stuff on the Peace Talks, but is also IMMEDIATELY under suspect. At least Mayweather is finally getting some, and is getting something to DO. Hoshi last episode, Mayweather this episode. Damn, they did this WAY too late.

Trip and T’Pol go to the moon, as they think that’s where the extremists are, and so is their baby. T’Pol follows the death of another doctor who worked at the same clinic as the girl they found, while Trip tries to get in with the racist assholes. One of their firebrand preachers is this black guy. Man, black men getting behind xenophobic and racist movements. That NEVER goes around to bite them in the ass. Anyways they’re both captured, and we find out Robert Cop, is Paxton, the owner of the mining facility. He’s got a very flat, fascisty affectation. Peter Weller is very good at playing the worst people of all time.

The mining facility is inexplicable a warp capable vessel, and it blasts off to Mars. Meanwhile, Enterprise arrests Mayweather’s girlfriend cause she is, of course, a spy. They chase after, but are too late. Paxton takes control of a super laser designed to stop comets and asteroids and uses it to piss on the moon like he’s Eggman.

See, it’s bad when ALIENS use lasers to kill and terrorize people, but when they do it it’s justified. Because they’re them. Anyways to be continued.

Terra Prime - ENT 7/10

Shit’s Bad. Terra Prime has more supporters than you’d like. I mean yeah, xenophobia sure is a thing on Earth, ain’t it?

The aliens at the conference are UNDERSTANDABLY bothered. Many want to dip. I don’t blame them. But there ARE people there who want to try things to work out, and convince them to stay. They’ll just… blow up the fucking colony and kill thousands of hostages, AND the Terra Prime leaders. And damage future Mars colonization. Oh goodie. Archer has a better option, though. Just, go in and stop them. Easy.

Reed talks to the Section 31 guy and gets more info. They leave on good terms. Oh good, I’m glad that guy is on our side and is a good guy, and I’m not wanting to fucking barf.

So uh, we get a lot of scenes of Robert Cop insulting the Vulcan Human Baby. She’s a clone that he ordered made, and he’s like “IT’S A FREAK OF NATURE THAT SHOULDN’T EXIST”. Why the fuck did you make her then?! What the fuck was your goal? I mean obviously, xenophobes are idiots. One of them goes “you should have thought better before making that freak with the alien and becoming a traitor to humanity”. YOU MADE HER. THEY DID NOT ACTUALLY PROCREATE. YOU DID THAT.

Oh shit, they’re leaving Hoshi as the acting captain on Enterprise. Not that we’ll prolly see her do anything…

lmao Robert Cop has a genetic condition that would get him killed, especially by his fascist savior Colonel Green who he quotes. But he’s still alive despite it being fatal. Cause he’s been taking medicine given freely by Rigelians. He’s a shitty hypocrite. Well, they got xenophobes quite well.

This is the kind of episode they should have written after 9/11, towards all the xenophobic remarks. Not whatever the fuck season 3 was.

Archer’s team makes it in and a firefight ensues. Reed and Trip are shot, and they fail anyway. The laser goes off… but misses anything, hitting the ocean, thanks to Reed sabotaging it. Shit’s fixed.

Things aren’t all good, though. We find out who the ACTUAL spy was, his name was Masaro, and he tells Archer he didn’t actually wanna hurt anyone (then why did you join a terrorist organization) before killing himself. Meanwhile, T’Pol and Trip name their baby Elizabeth, after Trip’s dead sister. But she’s dying due to genetic incompatability.

Archer gives a speach to standing ovation at the peace conference. Things are going to go well. Also, as a twist, Elizabeth died due to cloning problems, NOT genetic compatability :o TIME TO GET FUCKIN’ (also we already knew that, we met their future kid, but don’t worry about it). The episode prolly should have ended on the speach and not this.

There’s also a final episode but we’ve already watched 6 tonight so we’ll watch it later and I’ll append this when we do that next week.