Paint Chase

It’s nearing the end of 1983, and we’ve got a new game by LX Systems! This one is called Paint Chase, and it’s designed by Gerry Smolski. Up until this point it hasn’t been exactly apparent what Smolski or Chun brought to the table, but it’s made clear here. While Smolski had made a board game in the past, at LX Systems, he was the hardware specialist. LX Systems made the LX itself, as well, you see. And his job was to make sure everything worked on it. But he had an idea, and decided to branch out, and this was his first attempt. How did he do in his new role as game designer?

Paint Chase

Paint Chase is a racing action arcade game, though really less racing and more just themed around it. It’s more like Rally-X than a more modern idea of a racing game. You play as a little car that’s leaving paint behind it, and you need to paint as much of the ground as you can. At the end, you’ll be judged by how much of the arena is blue. Get above a threshhold, and more opnto the next level. There’s like 25 or 35 levels, and they get increasingly complex and difficult as you progress, throwing in new enemies and things. The enemies move around painting things pink. Pink or not pink doesn’t really matter to you, though, your main goal is just making EVERYTHING blue.

The game has some delightful music by Petterson, and it even has more cute cutscenes! A bit more expressive than what we get in Ninpek, these cutscenes are between every 5 or 10 levels or so, and introduce new enemies. It’s a welcome change.

Paint Chase

Unfortunately, it doesn’t fix the game for me. When I first played Paint Chase, it felt kind of mid to me, and it’s only worsened as I’ve played it more. The conceit and concept is fun enough, and it doesn’t play poorly. Your car can’t turn around, which can make for some “ah fuck” moments, but it’s fine. The main issue is the enemies. This game is way too long, and it’s an RNG nightmare. I managed to beat it, with a few pretty good levels. I got a score of 350. What do you need to win? 550. Jeezus. Basically at the end, for every percentage you’re over the required percentage, you get a point. Good enough concept, but the enemies are WAY too numerous. They can spawn right next to you and easily be taken out, which makes a good score easy. Or more likely, they will spawn on seperate sides of the arena.

Paint Chase

People watching me complain were like “oh, focus the gernades”. I did, then the slugs on the other side of the screen overwhelmed me. “Oh no, you need to focus the slugs.” So I did. Then the planes got me. “No, you need to focus the planes.” I CAN’T FOCUS ALL OF THESE THINGS, especially when they’re on seperate sides of the god damn map, and no matter what, I have to leave some of them alive, and some are faster than me. It’s an exercise in frustration, and no, I don’t like it very much at all. It’s just not very fun to play to conteract the frustration. I almost never feel like deaths are my fault, and that should never be how it is.

I’m sorry, Smolski. Maybe you’ll do better next time?

4/10