UFO 50 Retrospective Part 21 - Waldorf's Journey
THEY'RE COMING FOR YOUR TEETH
This is maybe the weirdest game in the entire pack, which is saying something considering the pack has Barbuta, Mooncat, and Divers.
I want you to imagine something, for a minute. Imagine it is alternate universe 1986. You go to Blockbuster and see a game on the shelf called “Waldorf’s Journey”, which has a cute walrus on the front. Oh boy! You love Walruses, this looks like a cute little adventure game! You bring it come, plug it in… you’re greeted with a shattered world with floating platforms and music that, while beautiful, is kind of… haunting, uncomfortable, dreamlike… You’re a little walrus, and there’s a sign near you. You move over to the sign, and read it, and it say’s the following:
“THEY’RE COMING FOR YOUR TEETH”
You’d be under your bed crying all night. That’s this game.
This game is a creepy pasta. Someone concepted this game as a fucking creepy pasta. This game wasn’t made, it spawned in a garage sale sold by a creepy old man who disappeared immediately after you bought it, and no one remembers him living there.
In Waldorf’s Journey you play… Waldorf, a cute Walrus who’s just a normal-ass Walrus. And he’s having a dream. The closest thing I can compare this to is a “Getting Over It” style game. You can control Waldorf’s angle and his jump, as he jumps between platforms, trying to get to the end of the dream. You can flap a bit to control yourself in the air. It’s almost golf-like. Yopu have a meter to control your flapping, which when it runs out, you’re flying blind, but you can regain power by eating fish. You’ve also got shells you can pick up, which you can spend on items from shops. There’s also puffins, which will save you if you fall. Your goal is to get to the end. The game is NOT long. It’s literally like a minute long as its shortest. I won’t spoil it, because it’s quite goofy in a way I love, and it’s one of my favorite games.
Waldorf’s Journey is very simple, and that CAN be bad. To some people it might feel like this is almost a nothing of a game. But to me, it’s weird-ass energy SELLS it, and I fucking LOVE it. God bless Waldorf.
There’s one other interesting thing to mention about this game…
This game gives special thanks in the credits to “Tao Nemuru”. This is the first time he’s ever mentioned, and while he currently is not affiliated with the company, Tao Nemuru is about to become EXTREMELY important to the story of UFO Soft. I’ll get into him later, once it becomes explicitely relevant.
9/10