LizstarTrek - The Original Series Season 3

So, over the past year, I have been watching the entirety of Star Trek, and been posting my thoughts on all the episodes and movies as I watch them. Now, I’ve been posting them on Twitter, and I’ll probably continue to do so until that website explodes. But I’ve been putting off putting all my thoughts on this site…. but I’ll go ahead and do that now!

SO! If you’re interested in my thoughts on every episode of Star Trek, and boy why wouldn’t you be, or if you’re interested in just re-living Star Trek with me, go ahead and read on! For future series where I probably ONLY post here, these will have a lot more thoughts on them, but the first few were only one Twitter post, so maybe not in depth.

I’ll also try and post more pictures to make it more… fun!

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Spocks Brain - TOS 2.5/10

Look, it’s not THAT bad. It’s cheesy in a fun and dumb way. Like yes, it’s poorly written, but it was not super offensive? Some of the shit with the women was gross and weird, but “THEY TOOK HIS BRAIN” and operating on a awake Spock is hilarious

I liked Robo Spock, Nimoy had a great acting day that day. He just had to stand there while everyone fought around him.

Its mostly VERY quotable, with very dumb poorly written lines. How was this written by the guy who did Devil in the Dark and Piece of the Action?

The Paradise Syndrome - TOS 1/10

I don’t know why people shit on Spock’s Brain. The worst episodes of Star Trek are ones that aren’t cheesy bad, but are just horrible ideas.

In this one, Native Americans believe the white man is God. Please god, why.

When Kirk’s new wife was like “I have a present for you :)” I was like “god no please do not be pregnant” AND THEN SHE WAS. I CRIED IN ANGUISH.

The ONLY good thing about this episode was the line “BEHOLD, THE GOD WHO BLEEDS!” that line goes hard.

The Enterprise Incident - TOS 9/10

Very good season 3 episode. Just a great stressful “how are they gonna get out of this” episode, with some espionage, and an interesting bait and switch on Angry Kirk, who turns out to actually be Clever Kirk. I like Clever Kirk.

Any time I see aliens that aren’t just humans I get excited. And the Romulans are done in a nice way this time, they’re maybe less “asshole jerk angry aliens” than they sometimes are portrayed as. I prefer that.

The thing holding this backis the Spock romance, IMO. It just felt unneccesary and awkward. Though the first lady commander of a starship is real cool. We made lots of fun jokes with that.

“Wow, what a girlboss. Trek is so progressive, making the muderous alien captain a woman. I can’t believe Trek is so woke”

She was rad tho

And The Children Shall Lead - TOS 4/10

A better creepy child story than Charlie-X, that’s for sure, but it showed its hand too soon and was just kinda annoying and slow paced.

Also children dancing in a circle and chanting “HAIL HAIL HAIL THE ANGEL” was fucking WEIRD to see in Star Trek.

Is There in Truth No Beauty? - TOS 7/10

I never really consider Trek to be impressive in acting chops or directing chops but holy shit, everyone put in a LOT of effort this episode. If only the writing team had really stepped up to bat too. It’s not BAD, just… eh.

My main issue is anytime it involves love, or trying to write the lady character. Often times it’s sexist or weird.

Though I gotta say, TOS usually shies away from truly alien aliens, and I was really impressed by the Medusan. A really cool idea, done well.

Looking into the history, apparently Roddenberry wanted to merchandise some parts from this episode in a weird way that pissed the rest of the crew off. Oh Roddenberry.

Also again, those camera angles. And Nimoy’s ACTING. He SOLD it this episode.

Spectre of the Gun - TOS 7/10

Kinda fun, surprisingly cerebral despite being such a goofy premise. The idea is that the Trek characters are forced into the role of those who died at the OK Corral. I also just like seeing Trek characters slammed back in time. But I’ll be real, Im tired of “CAN HUMANS OVERCOME THEIR CAPACITY TO KILL” plotlines. Yes. Let’s move on

Most interestingly about this episode is how it shows the law enforcement as the cruel evil group that no one likes. I think its historical license, but yo, hell yea Star Trek says ACAB.

Day of the Dove - TOS 9/10

This episode to me felt like actual proto Klingons. Kang was very good, the actor incredible. I like how he wasnt just evil, or a equal mind to bounce off Kirk, he felt like a Klingon who believed himself in the right. (shame about all the blackface but y’know how it is with this fucking series)

Very fun episode

All the acting here was honestly genuinely impressive, and the moral is one I like as well. The only real issue I have is the weirdly gratuitous sexual assault that was SO unnecessary, and even if it was shut down immediately, holy shit, that was not needed.

For The World Is Hollow And I Have Touched the Sky - TOS 5/10

The longest name of any Star Trek episode, it’s a damn cool name that takes up a lot of the characters in this tweet, and me talking about it doesn’t help.

This was one eh. Not bad. Coulda done more. The ending that reset everything feels like a cop-out, and it feels like there was no good payoff for the evil asshole AI that was ruling everything and being a dick for no reason. Also the Admiral that was a dick for no reason, like all Admirals are. Ehhhhhnnnn.

The Tholian Web - TOS 10/10

Prolly the best episode of this season. Good mystery, solving of mystery, and great character interactions. Seeing the tension really kept me on the edge of my seat. Tense, somehow touching, loved it.

The Tholians are sick, too.

Plato’s Step-Children - TOS 10/10

Wow. This STUNNED me. It’s a “Gods acting like spoiled children” episode. It had the infamous interracial kiss. But it had FANTASTIC writing, and Alexander as a character was so good and likable, he made this episode 100%.

This episode goes HARD.

Seeing a Spoiled God hold them against their will isn’t anything new, but showing them doing it to someone else as well, whoo. And the moral of “No! I can’t do to them what they’ve doen to me! I don’t WANT to be like them!!”

Also, Alexander has dwarfism, and after he asks Kirk if people like him are on Earth, and if they’re mocked there too, Kirk is like “No one should be treated poorly, not for their size, or color of their skin”

But gosh, Star Trek sure is woke now

I’ve always heard Season 3 is like, the worst. So far I’ve been really impressed. Two 10/10 amazing episodes, and almost all the others have been passable to good as well! Excited to watch more.

Wink of an Eye - TOS 7/10

Clever Kirk on full display! I was worried he’d become Horny Kirk at any moment, but he was Clever Kirk PRETENDING to be Horny Kirk. That’s a fun Kirk.

Season 3’s acting chops are impressive. This one was fine. Not incredible, but good.

Oh yeah I forgot to mention Ensign Dumbass, who goes with the landing onto a planet with an SoS signal but the entire civilization has disappeared, and he’s taking water samples and just DRINKS SOME. JUST CAUSE.

Are you surprised he died??? I sure was, wowee! Neli screamed out “WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!” I thought she was yelling at her cat.

Almost as bad as the time in like season 1 that guy took off his hazmat suit to scratch his eye.

Anyways, okay episode. Only really bad stuff was some forced kiss bullshit.

The Empath - TOS 6/10

This one was weird to me. I felt the premise was half baked. Like, there were SO MANY BETTER WAYS TO DETERMINE THE WORTH OF THIS GIRL THAN KILLING PEOPLE. But the acting and writing is really really good? Over all, mixed bag, but not bad.

One thing I notice I haven’t mentioned yet about Season 3 of TOS is all of the different camera angles. It’s like, weirdly artsy at times? Seasons 1 and 2 the most out there angles we got were the eye-light shots, here it’s all so dynamic. It’s REALLY interesting.

Elaan of Troyius - TOS 6/10

The first half was VERY good, then I didn’t like the second half at all. It still evens out to okay. Kirk is really interesting here, he was so sassy in a Tribbles way, but then when they did the love angle, it all just falls apart. His “I’m so done with this shit” energy was so fun, and then he became really soft and… uninteresting after being forced to fall in love with her.

Not nearly as bad as it could have been, though. They coulda gone in some gross and bad ways.

Whom Gods Destroy - TOS

6.5/10

An asylum episode could be very bad, and this one was okay. They didn’t fall into any of the pitfalls, but it had a lot of ups and downs. The belly dance was unneccesary, some dialogue was fun, the “no I’m the real kirk” part was fun

The most fascinating part about this episode is the Green Space Babe. The ONLY Green Space Babe in TOS, and she became a trope codifier.

And they BLEW HER UP in an EXTREMELY brutal death scene. Also very muppety way, just poof, she’s dead. Meat chunks shoulda flew.

Let That Be Your Last Battlefield - TOS 5/10

This one was real hard to rate. This is “the racism” episode, btw. So… on the one hand, it has its heart in the right place? And it has some good commentary. But god, this feels like such liberal mealy mouth bullshit

It reminds me of “the nazi” episode where it just misses the mark, hard. Two sides, both hate each other. One has enslaved the other and has them in camps, this is admitted. But the writers look at these nazi and jew analogues and go “the problem is they both hate!”

The best part is when it has comments on how stupid racism is, like in the nazi episode, the two people are like “well can’t you tell how we’re different? And how I’m CLEARLY superior?” but the other difference is slight coloration changes.

But again, both sides BS

All that said, I cannot hate this episode. It was progressive for its time, had some good lines and tense moments, and its trying, but I’m sorry, portraying the oppressed for being in the wrong for trying to stop their oppressor does not sit well with me in 2022.

This part made me laugh, though.

Lokai: “You Humans haven’t had discrimination on your planet since the 20th century, you know” Me: “Yeah, thank God that’s over now that it’s the 21st century, huh?”

The Mark of Gideon - TOS 1.5/10

Wow. This one is not good. Riddled with plot holes, and I’m not someone who gives a shit about minor plotholes, but why the fuck did Kirk not bring a communicator with him? How did this civilization make a replica Enterprise????

There was an entire episode where Romulans were willing to do war crimes to get the plans to the Enterprise, the most high tech ship in the Federation, and this civilization that refuses to communicate with the Federation somehow can make a perfect replica. Okay.

And this is to say nothing of its message. Overpopulation bad. Abortion and condoms ALSO bad. Kirk literally offered this civilization condoms and they said no. But you know what isnt bad? Genocide by disease. Okay

The ONLY good thing about this ep was Spock’s sass. And even that isn’t great because its so massively out of character.

And it just… abruptly ends. Who knows what happens to Spock, who disobeyed a direct order by Star Fleet. I assume he’s dismissed off screen.

That Which Survives - TOS 6/10

Interesting premise, it sets up a good mystery but a few things kinda hold it back. Idiot crewmen, and Spock being WEIRDLY rude? Like, when he was sassy at first it was funny. Then it never stopped. Dude. Be nice to Scotty.

Some funny parts to this though. The woman going “PLEASE, LET ME TOUCH YOU” made me laugh a bit. I feel the ending coulda been a bit better but overall, not bad

The Lights of Zetar - TOS 6/10

Can’t really think of anything wrong with this episode, but nothing I really liked either. Memory Alpha as a concept is SUPER cool (of course, the librarian, would think that) but a Library World is so rad and needs to be seen more

This show often has people hold The Idiot Ball, but instead of The Idiot Ball, it’s the “I’m Attracted To A Woman And Dumb” ball. Scotty held it this episode, which sucks!

Requiem for Methuselah - TOS 1.5/10

This is really sad, because it has a lot of really cool set ups? The idea of just a dude who found out he can’t die and has lived for literally six thousand years, both Forest Gumpin’ it through history BEING history, is cool

Meanwhile, it sets up themes about Humanity being kinda evil and terrible? And how he’s never seen them truly improve. And Kirk says they have, we don’t do that colonization anymore. We’ll ASK for what we want, then when you say no, we’ll take it.

A GOOD SETUP.

I’d say in the end that colonization theme is the D plot, a deady virus that they ignore for most of it is the C plot, him being old is the B plot maybe, and Kirk falling in love with some woman he met 4 hours ago is the A plot, and wow, is it really bad.

Kirk is just ignoring his dying crew because a girl was hot near him. Thats the Kirk Stereotype, but wow, Horny Kirk is WAY too much here, it’s legit creepy and uncomfortable, and he acts like a teenager once she turns out to be an android who DIES OF A BROKEN HEART

MY MAN. THIS SERIES HAS BEEN THREE YEARS. IN THAT TIME, YOU’VE FALLEN IN LOVE WITH LIKE, FIVE WOMEN, ONE OF THEM THROUGH A CHEMICAL PROCESS THAT MAKES YOU UNABLE TO EVER FORGET OR NOT BE IN LOVE WITH YOU

I THINK YOU’LL BE FINE. PLEASE STOP CRYING, YOU FUCKING BABY.

The Savage Curtain - TOS 8.5/10

So this is one of my favorite episodes, which seems dumb, right? This is the episode where they’re flying through space and contacted by Abraham Lincoln sitting on a chair. It’s really dumb. But, I actually kinda love it?

This could have been very bad. Roddenberry’s weird patriotic bullshit was VERY bad in that one America episode, so them jacking off Lincoln for 30 minutes coulda sucked. And he IS lionized, but not to an extreme, it’s still enjoyable, and he’s likable.

I just like the Arena-esque episodes, where it’s a god alien putting our heroes in a battle royale to prove, learn, or teach something. This is that, with a LOT of lore and history that fleshes out the world and feels cool to learn. And the Good VS evil stuff is fun

The Way to Eden - TOS 2.5/10

The Hippie Episode! This could have been way worse… but it coulda been WAY better, too. I think “counter culture in the 23rd century in space” could be a good set up for something. But instead it’s a scapegoat to whine about kids.

A lot of this episode feels like a strawman to complain about how shitty hippies are. The crew are respectful, understanding, and want to help. The hippies reject their help, take over the ship, and almost kill people. It’s less hippies and more a literal cult.

Anything with Chekov and the girl he likes today was really uncomfortable. Them making Spock, the fucking Vulcan, relate most to the Hippies, a cult all about emotion and rejecting science and logic, is the most batshit idea. But there are SOME HINTS of good, here.

Also this scene with Sulu was weird. Why the hell is he smiling like that

If this looks uncomfy, imagine him holding this smile for a 20 second scene.

We’re at the final 4 episodes of ToS. I don’t… expect this to get any better lol

The Cloud Minders - TOS 6.5/10

I was surprised by this one. I feel it could have gone harder with the workers rights stuff, but its heart is in the right place, it just fumbles a bit. The Spock Romance subplot was unneccesary and bad, and it both sides’d it a bit

I think I was most pleasantly surprised by Kirk. He meets the rebel leader, a lady, by her wrestling him in his bed to try and kidnap him. I FULLY expected Horny Kirk to be out, but no, he’s moral Kirk, strong headed but just, and I think this is a good Kirk episode

The both sidesing wasn’t really that bad, either. The rebels don’t believe Kirk is going to help them. I guess, why would they? So they betray him. It kinda portrays em as savage, which the upper class SAY they are, and that’s unfortunate. But tbh I get their side.

All Our Yesterdays - TOS 7/10

A really solid premise, tense, exciting, creative, but once again weakened by a weird unneccesary Spock romance plot? They give a plot reason at least but “hes chemically altered to be a past Vulcan” is still weird and doesnt help much

The premise of “apocalypse is coming, let’s use the time machine to go back to the time period we like most and live out our lives” is REALLY COOL? But imagine being the mother fucker who decided to live during the inquisition. Or the mother fucking ice age.

Also, fun thing. Spock and McCoy are stranded in the ice age, saved by a figure in fur robes. Neli goes “the hood is going to be lifted off, and it’ll be a gorgeous woman in full makeup”

AND SURE E-FUCKIN’ NOUGH.

Turnabout Intruder - TOS 0/10

This is it. It won’t get better than this. This, the final TOS episode. It’s infamous. It’s legendary. It’s fucking terrible. I want all the people who said Spock’s Brain is the worst episode to get on their knees and apologize to me directly.

This broke the scale. There are no redeeming qualities. What few qualities it’d have are poisoned by the odious basic concept. Positives first I guess.

The idea of a plot where an imposter swaps bodies with Kirk could be cool if done right. There. The only positive

To start with the many, MANY negatives (not even getting into plot holes and garbage like that), here are some quotes directly from the episode.

“Your world of starship captains doesn’t admit women”

“It is better to be dead than alone in the body of a woman”

The basic premise is, self hating woman swaps bodies with Kirk because she can’t be a captain.

Roddenberry: “My series will be a positive, idyllic future where all peoples are equal and can be what they want” Person: “Great idea!” Roddenberry: “Except the women.”

Women are too EMOTIONAL and IRRATIONAL to be in control. And it’s obvious! After all, this woman is bad at being Kirk! And only when she’s OVERLY EMOTIONAL does the connection break!

Watching Shatner play a woman playing a man made me want to punch him even more than I already always do.

At least the lady actor was… good. Honestly the acting was fine but it all was so fucking uncomfortable. I do wonder if I WASN’T a woman would I be this disgusted by it, but I sure fucking hope so. It’s widely reviled and for good god damn reason.

And there it is. That’s it. I’ve now watched every single Original Series episode. Good stuff. But also very bad stuff. Over all like, it’s a mixed bag. There’s a lot of fun here but so much you can and SHOULD skip.

Took me from March to October. What a time.